The Gongshow Hockey OATH
Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Posted by GSH-Webby

The Gongshow Hockey Oath

"I hereby declare, on the Gongshow Hockey oath, that I absolutely and entirely renounce and abjure all allegiance and fidelity to any foreign sport; that I will support and defend my teammates against all plugs, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the sacred game itself; that I will drop my gloves on behalf of my teammates when required knowing that they will do the same for me; that I will perform various unselfish duties to be a true wingman to my teammates on and off the ice; that I will always keep sacred the art of pond hockey with my father; that I accept my role as a beauty on and off the ice; that I will keep all state secrets behind the doors of the sanctified locker room; and that I take this obligation freely without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; so help me Gretzky."