Knuckles' First Fistfull
Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Posted by Knuckles12

Unless you are deaf, blind, both or Axl Rose, chances are you have by now heard that the Leafs have finally strapped the 18th Captain's "C" onto the chest of Dion Phaneuf. Regardless of whether or not he had deserved it yet, it remains hard to deny the considerable impact that he had on the team when he was acquired in January.

So the Leafs have a rudder now, which is good to see. It was getting painful not having anyone clearly adequate enough to wear the C for the Blue and White, after watching Mats Sundin jerk himself off all the way to Vancouver. Although just a similarity, and nothing more, Phaneuf becomes the first Albertan born Leaf captain since a certain 1987 Leaf draftee, Wendel Clark. If Phaneuf can come close to replicating the amount of intensity, skill and good natured will to kill somebody as Clark did, Leaf fans should finally have some actual optimism in regards to the upcoming season.

Not only that, but Pillsbury Dough Boy Phil Kessel is announcing he hopes to put 40 pucks in the net this season, saying with a full off season to train and a full season, it is in reach. And although I agree with him, I hear the words of Ricky saying "I hate to say a-toad-a-so, but a-toad-a-so, a fuckin' a-toad-a-so." eerily present in the background. Maybe I'm crazy, but when it comes to Southern Ontario guarantees, they do seem to fall short. Just ask Daniel Alfreddsson, Paul Maurice or Ron Wilson, who's optimism of the past turned them into idiots who seemed to be looking into a crystal ball for answers.

But amongst the splashes in Toronto, questions clearly still remain. What is going to happen with Kaberle this summer before August 15th? Will he be moved and who for? Not only that, what the fuck is Nik Kulemin doing? Hopefully its chasing the elusive Anna Kournikova back in Russia because he sure as hell isn't talking much to Burke and Co. Oh, and that whole first line center thing might be a pressing issue too. Not that I don't like Ty Bozak or Nazem Kadri, but come on...

Should be another excitingly complacent summer for Leaf fans, waiting to see if this team either continues a positive rebuild or fucks up again and trade their 2012 first rounder for, who knows, Antero Niittymaki? *couch* Toskala*cough*

Feeding fists and bitches my dick,
Knuckles